Our Relationship
by Blue Pansies
Summary: Austin thinks about his relationship with Ally, from the start to now


The relationship between me and Ally is like reading a book. There's a beginning, there's happy parts, sad parts, hopeful parts, and confusing parts. Sometime you know what's going to happen next, sometimes you're completely clueless. There are still many more pages to go, and I can't wait to read them. I'm hoping there's a happy ending, like in most other books, but then again, as similar as it is, our relationship _isn't _a book. This is real life, and in real life, the future is a thick, foggy mist that you can't see, no matter what. But looking back, our relationship is wild and crazy, and I wouldn't trade it for the world.

It started a few weeks after we became partners. By then, we weren't just getting together to write songs, or for Team Austin meetings. I started coming over just because I felt like it, and we started hanging out- real hanging out, for non work-related reasons. One moment we were partners, the next we were friends. Not just Ally and I, but Trish and Dez too. We played on the instruments, visited the zoo, walked around the mall, but suddenly, these little things were so much more fun when I did them with Ally. She was...refreshing. We argued (not as much as Trish and Dez), but when we did, it was usually a play-fight, like we were playing a game and both of us wanted to win. We always ended up laughing, and having a different view on things. That was another thing I loved about the relationship Ally and I had. We both had different views on the world. But we shared them with each other, and kept an open mind, and I think we both changed because of one another, but it a good way. For one, I have better grades now (praise the lord), and Ally is more loose and carefree. Not to mention, one of the biggest changes of all: we both helped cure the other's fears. My fear of umbrellas, for one, is gone (thanks goodness- do you know how hard it is to drink a smoothie and NOT look at the little umbrella in it?) And Ally's stage fright is now gone, meaning she can finally show the world how talented she is.

Ally's friendship changed my life, and at the same time... I realized how much I like that...and her.

Now actually BEING together...that started with Kira Starr. Some of you might think it started when we shot my first music video, but I think it started when she cured her horrible breath. I thought that now that it wasn't in the way, I could finally go after Kira and start a relationship with her. I think part of me knew I had feelings for Ally, but I had subconsciously buried it so deep in fear of losing our friendship, that I truly believed I only saw Ally as a friend (yeah, Ally's intelligence has been rubbing off on me...). So everything was pretty clear to me: get Kira to go out with me and be my girlfriend and live happily ever after. There wasn't a doubt in my mind. So naturally, I enlisted the help of my awesome best (girl) friend to help me out, because I didn't have a romantic bone in my body (Ally told I am romantic, I just didn't know it.- I still don't believe her). Ally planned out his amazing, albeit cheesy, date, and we did a practice run through. When she curled up next to me, and we were cuddling and talking about how we'd feel butterflies... I guess _I_ felt butterflies. But I told myself it was nothing, just pre-date jitters. It had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that my best friend was sitting so close to me, and that she was looking at me with those beautiful brown eyes. Nope. I don't know what would have happened had Dez not interrupted. Would we have kissed? Would we have confessed our feelings and gotten together? I don't know, it'll just be another what it... although I really wanted to punch Dez for interrupting. Then he started talking about how we'd get Kira to go out with me, and I tried to ignore what had just happened. But I didn't miss the hurt look on Ally's face, and I felt so guilty...but it disappeared as soon as it came, so I thought I was seeing things. Anyway, long story short, the date was a disaster, but I didn't blame Ally, how could she have known? And she still helped a lot, and tried to fix things, so it was fine. Kira and I got together, just like I had wanted. But...it still didn't feel right. I told myself I just didn't know her well enough yet, so I filled up my schedule with dates with her. I felt bad for ignoring Ally, Dez and Trish, but they understood (I love my friends).

Then came Elliot.

I had a bad feeling about him from the start. When Ally first told us about her friend from camp, I thought he'd be kinda like a friendly nerd. I did not think he would be a good looking guy who had the potential to be Ally's boyfriend. Suddenly, I wasn't paying attention to progressing my relationship with Kira, I was doing everything I could to make sure Ally didn't become his girlfriend. I never stopped for a moment to consider why I was acting like this. A conversation with Dez made me realize I DID in fact have feelings for Ally. I never realized how much I loved seeing her smile, or laugh, or just plain SEEING her... anyway. I tried to forget about those feelings, and you know what happened? Nothing. They were still there. After a long night filled with competitions and jealousy (I'm man enough to admit I was a little jealous), Kira basically told me to make up my mind and tell her her decision. Good news is, Ally didn't see Elliot that way, and neither did Elliot! Bad news is, now I was even more confused. Later that night, we were _this _close to kissing, but Ally stopped us right before we did. She basically gave me more time to think about my decision, which I'm VERY grateful for, even if I wouldn't have objected to her not stopping the kiss...

After that came Ally's mom.

Penny Dawson is incredibly like Ally, I'll tell you that. They even LOOKED alike. Anyway, the entire time Ally was preparing for our duet and getting over her stage fright, I was busy trying to decide who I wanted to be with. Kira or Ally? They were both awesome, but going out with Ally might endanger our friendship. What if we broke up? The answer seemed simple: choose Kira. So I did. I told Kira, but she was hesitant, not that I blamed her. I gave her time, just like she did with me. After the performance, Ally and I went backstage. I was so proud of her! She was telling me she couldn't have done it without me, and I was telling her I knew I could do anything as long as I was with her, and before I knew it, we were leaning in, and then our lips met, and I felt a thousand amazing feelings, and as cliche as it sounds, it was like there was only her and me, and not Trish and Dez, who were watching with their mouths wide open ( we all laughed about it later). And suddenly, it was all clear. How could I have even considered Kira, when the perfect girl really was closer that I thought? But then Kira was there, telling me she would be my girlfriend, and I remembered how I had chosen her. But all I could see was Ally's shocked and hurt face.

But now I had made up my mind. I wanted to be with Ally. She wanted me to break up with Kira first, which was completely understandable, but I was having trouble with doing so. I didn't want to hurt her again. Man, I just kept on hurting her and Ally, didn't I? But I did it, I broke up with her, and I was free to be with Ally. But she seemed so over me, so I tried to win her over with a romantic gesture. Of course, the piano just HAD to crash in her party and ruin everything. While I was moping in the practice room, Dez came in to check on me. I told him how she probably hated me now. I know I shouldn't have looked in her book, but I was curious about the song she wrote, and I needed a distraction from the fact that I had ruined my chances with her. I may not be as smart as Ally, but even I could tell that the lyrics in her song were about me. "_I think about you, every moment every day of my life, you're on my mind, all the time, it's true" _It still makes me warm and tingly every time I think about it. She still liked me! I was ecstatic. And thinking about the lyrics, I felt the exact same way. And then it clicked. I knew what I had to do.

I was so worried that I was wrong, that the song wasn't about me, that she didn't like me anymore. But singing it to her, it was like there was just me and her, just like when we kissed, and the smile on her face, and the way her eyes shone made it all worth it. We were finally together and I couldn't be happier. We had both taken a break from songwriting just to spend more time with each other, but the things we did, while they were a step up from friendship, still wasn't all that couple-y. So I decided we needed to go on our first official date. We were both excited, but also very nervous. I brushed it off as normal, but I couldn't help but feel that I shouldn't be this nervous about a date, especially not with someone who was one of my closest friends. The date was a disaster. It was so awkward! Neither of us was sure how to act. Should we be sickeningly sweet, like those couples you saw at restaurants, who fed each other, or should we act like two friends out for dinner? Anyway, we both decided to just let it go, and continue as if nothing had happened. We had gotten a major gig, writing a song for a movie, so we decided to focus on that instead. But again, our new status got in the way. How were we supposed to act during songwriting. I was scared that if I rejected her idea, their would be a rift in our new relationship. But now, us being a couple was hurting our songwriting, our _careers_. In the end, we decided to stay as friends, because we obviously weren't ready to juggle work while in a relationship.

So here we are, back where we started, and yet, everything is different. I don't know if Ally still likes me. I don't know if I still like her. But I have complete faith that our story _will_ have a happily ever after.


End file.
